Rest for Moms
Preached 5/10/2020 at SouthWest UU in N. Royalton OH
By Rev. Meg Mathieson
Happy Mothers Day! And sad Mothers Day. And all of the complex feelings that every one of us feels on Mothers day.
Mothers Day is an interesting holiday because we all have mothers, we all had mothers, we have all struggled with a mother figure. But of course there are so many mixed emotions for most of us.
Speaking as a mother of three teens who do not live with me but are states away with their father, this is a painful Mothers Day. More painful than most because of the interruptions that COVID-19 has made in our lives and our routines. I came across an article by psychologist Dr. Michelle Maidenburg that expresses this so very well. She says:
This is a Mother’s Day we will forever remember...Life as we know it has drastically changed and with it comes complexities and concerns over all the systems and structures that revolve around us.
There is new consideration of our safety, health, economic viability, socialization, among other things... Never could we have imagined being in this predicament.
On this Mother’s Day I am processing the impact that it is having on my children and the sadness I feel, that yet again, they are in the middle of what feels like another Armageddon.
If mass shootings, school shootings, and terrorism were not enough in their lifetimes, they are further confronted with being forced to cope with circumstance that are challenging on so many levels.
There are things that I feel sorry for and other things that I feel gratitude for that they have to endure.
And here, Dr. Maidenberg lists her sorrows:
My Children, she says, I’m Sorry That… Your schooling and learning were abruptly disrupted.
You must learn in a manner that may not be conducive to your learning style and needs.
You missed major milestones and events that needed to be rescheduled or canceled.
You are denied natural human connection and affection that you are used to, miss, and want.
Your socialization is inhibited, as your natural development directs you into prioritizing your peer relationships.
You hear on a daily basis about death and destruction caused by a disease we know very little about.
(pause)
Then she goes on to her list of gratitudes, and there are many. And as I read them, I encourage you to hear these gratitudes personally. What I mean is, apply them to yourself. I am grateful for these things and how they are helping us to grow as a community:
You have the ability to challenge your resilience and build adaptive coping skills through the adversity.
You are learning to be more cognizant, sensitive to, and advocate for the greater good.
You are realizing that life is filled with uncertainty so there is a need to intentionally be in and appreciate the present moment.
What if at this point I switch from saying you to saying we. These statements have proven true for SWUU as a community. For instance:
We are continuing to develop the flexibility to take risks, make transitions, and strategize.
We have had the opportunity to tap into true gratitude for our relationships and face to face contact, communication, and connection.
We are developing stronger gratitude for freedom, health, and human connection.
We are gaining knowledge about nurturing our environment and witnessed the skies clearing of pollution and wildlife returning to newly clear waters.
We are more aware of hygiene, health, self-care, and fitness.
We are recognizing that we can work to accommodate change and stretch ourselves to limits that we never thought we could.
We witness healthcare providers and first responders being praised and recognized instead of the typical athletes and celebrities.
We observe everyday heroes including frontline workers such as supermarket cashiers, bus drivers, garbageman, postman, security guards, etc. getting the recognition they deserve.
We have a greater awareness about the value of human life.
When I spoke with my mentor recently, she said “Thank goodness for pandemics” and I had to admit that I’m not quite spiritually or emotionally elevated to the point of saying that myself.
But maybe, this Mothers Day, we can be a little grateful for what we have learned about what togetherness and connection really mean.
I’d like to invite you to get as comfortable as possible for a special Mothers Day meditation.
Close your eyes and take a deep breath in.
As you exhale, imagine any stress or discomfort leaving your body.
Do this for 3 more breaths, allowing each one to get a little deeper.
Keep breathing deeply and slowly as I speak.
Now focus your attention on your heart.
Think of someone who has been a mother to you – either your actual Mom or another person in your life who has cared for you, loved you, and guided you to the person you are now.
Feel the love this person has given you.
Allow that love to travel throughout your body, filling you up until you are overflowing with it.
Now take a moment to send this person silent blessings.
Thank this person for sharing their love with you.
Imagine this person overflowing with joy because of you.
Notice the circle of love created by this exchange of giving and receiving.
Extend this love to all the mothers, mother figures, and children of the world.
Know that this flow of love is a universal life force that exists within each of us and that you are never too old to need this love. From the day you were born you required this love to survive. Tapping into this nurturing energy can remind you that you are loved unconditionally, each and every day.
Take a few deep breaths and slowly open your eyes.
My prayer for you is that you bring this sense of calm and relaxation to the rest of your day.
Preached 5/10/2020 at SouthWest UU in N. Royalton OH
By Rev. Meg Mathieson
Happy Mothers Day! And sad Mothers Day. And all of the complex feelings that every one of us feels on Mothers day.
Mothers Day is an interesting holiday because we all have mothers, we all had mothers, we have all struggled with a mother figure. But of course there are so many mixed emotions for most of us.
Speaking as a mother of three teens who do not live with me but are states away with their father, this is a painful Mothers Day. More painful than most because of the interruptions that COVID-19 has made in our lives and our routines. I came across an article by psychologist Dr. Michelle Maidenburg that expresses this so very well. She says:
This is a Mother’s Day we will forever remember...Life as we know it has drastically changed and with it comes complexities and concerns over all the systems and structures that revolve around us.
There is new consideration of our safety, health, economic viability, socialization, among other things... Never could we have imagined being in this predicament.
On this Mother’s Day I am processing the impact that it is having on my children and the sadness I feel, that yet again, they are in the middle of what feels like another Armageddon.
If mass shootings, school shootings, and terrorism were not enough in their lifetimes, they are further confronted with being forced to cope with circumstance that are challenging on so many levels.
There are things that I feel sorry for and other things that I feel gratitude for that they have to endure.
And here, Dr. Maidenberg lists her sorrows:
My Children, she says, I’m Sorry That… Your schooling and learning were abruptly disrupted.
You must learn in a manner that may not be conducive to your learning style and needs.
You missed major milestones and events that needed to be rescheduled or canceled.
You are denied natural human connection and affection that you are used to, miss, and want.
Your socialization is inhibited, as your natural development directs you into prioritizing your peer relationships.
You hear on a daily basis about death and destruction caused by a disease we know very little about.
(pause)
Then she goes on to her list of gratitudes, and there are many. And as I read them, I encourage you to hear these gratitudes personally. What I mean is, apply them to yourself. I am grateful for these things and how they are helping us to grow as a community:
You have the ability to challenge your resilience and build adaptive coping skills through the adversity.
You are learning to be more cognizant, sensitive to, and advocate for the greater good.
You are realizing that life is filled with uncertainty so there is a need to intentionally be in and appreciate the present moment.
What if at this point I switch from saying you to saying we. These statements have proven true for SWUU as a community. For instance:
We are continuing to develop the flexibility to take risks, make transitions, and strategize.
We have had the opportunity to tap into true gratitude for our relationships and face to face contact, communication, and connection.
We are developing stronger gratitude for freedom, health, and human connection.
We are gaining knowledge about nurturing our environment and witnessed the skies clearing of pollution and wildlife returning to newly clear waters.
We are more aware of hygiene, health, self-care, and fitness.
We are recognizing that we can work to accommodate change and stretch ourselves to limits that we never thought we could.
We witness healthcare providers and first responders being praised and recognized instead of the typical athletes and celebrities.
We observe everyday heroes including frontline workers such as supermarket cashiers, bus drivers, garbageman, postman, security guards, etc. getting the recognition they deserve.
We have a greater awareness about the value of human life.
When I spoke with my mentor recently, she said “Thank goodness for pandemics” and I had to admit that I’m not quite spiritually or emotionally elevated to the point of saying that myself.
But maybe, this Mothers Day, we can be a little grateful for what we have learned about what togetherness and connection really mean.
I’d like to invite you to get as comfortable as possible for a special Mothers Day meditation.
Close your eyes and take a deep breath in.
As you exhale, imagine any stress or discomfort leaving your body.
Do this for 3 more breaths, allowing each one to get a little deeper.
Keep breathing deeply and slowly as I speak.
Now focus your attention on your heart.
Think of someone who has been a mother to you – either your actual Mom or another person in your life who has cared for you, loved you, and guided you to the person you are now.
Feel the love this person has given you.
Allow that love to travel throughout your body, filling you up until you are overflowing with it.
Now take a moment to send this person silent blessings.
Thank this person for sharing their love with you.
Imagine this person overflowing with joy because of you.
Notice the circle of love created by this exchange of giving and receiving.
Extend this love to all the mothers, mother figures, and children of the world.
Know that this flow of love is a universal life force that exists within each of us and that you are never too old to need this love. From the day you were born you required this love to survive. Tapping into this nurturing energy can remind you that you are loved unconditionally, each and every day.
Take a few deep breaths and slowly open your eyes.
My prayer for you is that you bring this sense of calm and relaxation to the rest of your day.